Mourning
by Cenlyra
Summary: Andromeda Tonks tries to put the deaths of her husband, daughter, and especially sister behind her.
1. Chapter 1

**This is for the Letters from Heaven challenge on the HPFC forum. I don't own any characters in this… Enjoy!**

Bella darling,

I just can't let it go. Despite it all: the Longbottoms, all the Muggles and Muggle-borns, everyone you've ever killed or tortured, Ted, Nymphadora, me; I just can't help but love you.

I have only one question: why? Why did you do it? Why join Him? Was family pride that important to you that you'd disown everyone you ever loved? It can't have been worth over a decade in Azkaban, can it?

And Ted and Nymphadora are my family. Why did you take them away from me? For years, they were my entire life. And Nymphadora had just had her baby. Teddy. You've orphaned an innocent child, but I can't get angry.

You're still my sister, no matter what happens and what you choose to believe. And you left me. I've always looked up to you, always needed you, and you abandoned me when I needed you most. You tortured me, used the Cruciatus on your own sister. But I was okay; pain becomes nothing when your heart is broken. You were already far gone by then, so I can't really blame you.

Did you ever regret doing all that you did? Or maybe wish you could take it back?

Your sister, now and forever

Andromeda

_Andromeda Tonks threw the letter on the small bonfire in her backyard. She still didn't feel comfortable going out in public, not with the whole wizarding world clamoring for her story: how she was raising her orphaned grandson, whose mother was killed by her own aunt: Andromeda's sister._

_Still, she mourned. She mourned her daughter and husband, it's true. But she also mourned her sister, the woman whose total devotion had led to all their deaths._

_Andromeda watched solemnly as the smoke spiraled upward and the letter charred around the edges. Then the letter fell out of the fire, completely unsinged. She picked up the parchment and started to throw it back into the fire when something caught her eye._

My dear Andromeda…


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2, just like Chapter 1, was written for HPFC's Letters from heaven challenge. I used quotes 2 and 6. Like I say in everything that I write, I do not own these characters. Wish I did, but I don't.**

_Andromeda looked more closely at the letter. Sure enough, the letter was not the same one she had written._

My dear Andromeda,

They say the worst thing about death is leaving people behind. Honestly, I'm strongly tempted to disagree; it's far worse to encounter people you've hurt. And then have them forgive you.

Like she did. I never realized before, how well you did raising her; I was too far gone. But she's just like you. And she misses you, and her son.

Do you remember the first day we saw our family tapestry? You were only a small child then, about four years old. Aunt Walburga took me aside that day and explained all about Muggles and Mudbloods.

_Andromeda stopped reading at that point and balled up the letter to throw it into the fire once again. She loved her sister, but that insult was absolutely unforgivable, especially since she could tell her sister's mind was whole again for the first time since childhood. With tears in her eyes, she threw the crumpled up parchment directly into the center of the fire._

_It bounced off, as if the fire was shielding itself against the letter until Andromeda finished reading. She picked up the letter, which had uncrumpled itself and was lying completely flat. There was a scorch mark, however, on part of the letter. Curious, Andromeda started reading again._

Aunt Walburga took me aside that day and explained all about Muggles and–

_The scorch mark was over the next word. A new word was scribbled into the margin of the page._

–Muggle-borns.

She told me that we had the right to rule because of our magic, and she expected that I would take that right and purify the wizarding race. For the sake of my sisters. And I believed her; I knew that I would someday fight for the right to protect you. She told me that the two of you needed me more than I needed you. I've only recently come to realize that she was wrong. I needed both of you, but I especially needed you, Andie. You could have stopped me; you could have kept me from doing some of the things that I sincerely regret now. But you were off somewhere doing Merlin-knows-what with that Mud–

_As Andromeda started to glare at the letter again, the offending word was crossed off and a new word written above it._

–Muggle-born. I needed you, Andie. You could have stopped me. If you'd stayed, I would have listened to you. I wouldn't have joined the Dark Lord; I wouldn't have tortured the Longbottoms. I wouldn't have–

_The next part of the letter was written in another's handwriting. With a gasp of shock, Andromeda recognized it as her mother's._

Andromeda Cassiopeia Black, you do realize this is all your fault, right? If you hadn't run off with that filthy Mudblood – no, I will not change what I believe just for one letter to a pathetic blood traitor – then she wouldn't have wasted those years in Azkaban; instead, she would still be a rising star. You are the most disgraceful daughter a mother could ever have, and I am ashamed to know I brought you into this world.

_Andromeda glared at the letter again, muttering, "Well, I outlived you, so it doesn't matter." _

_She sighed with relief as she saw Bellatrix's writing start up again._

Now do you see why I had to do it? Without you, it was just her screaming at me. And with all of them saying the same thing, and you not saying anything at all, is it really a wonder I had no other choice? I'm not trying to blame you; Merlin knows you've got enough to try and blame yourself for, but a family like them… They could have poisoned the mind of Potter himself.

Anyway, that's over, and I'm glad. I always cared for you deep down, even when I didn't realize it. I'm sorry for all the pain I caused you, and I will not be writing again. There is a reason that death is final. We won't meet again until you cross that line.

Until then, with love,

Bellatrix

_As Andromeda finished reading the letter, it crumpled itself up and threw itself into the bonfire. It started to scorch around the edges, and Andromeda watched it. The last words left on the parchment were "with love." As those words became illegible, tears started to fall from Andromeda's eyes. She slowly stood up and extinguished the fire._

**Okay, that was very… hard to write. Just like the last chapter, this is for the Letters from Heaven challenge at HPFC, this time with quotes 2 and 6. If you don't like my dead Bella, too bad. I just wanted her to be good on the inside for once. I'll make her wonderfully evil another time, maybe. We'll see. Anyway, please R/R. I love that review button. You love that review button. Please push that review button. If I made you cry, I want to know. If you didn't like my dead Bella, despite what I said earlier, I want to know. Pretty, pretty please?**


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